It all happened in one moment...a moment that seemed to pan for forever. Wednesday we got a call for our first placement with the local County Department of Children Services. However, it wasn't only just one placement but rather a sibling placement. A three year old and supposedly 3 month old. My heart jumped as I asked for a few moments to call and clear it with my husband as this would impact the two of us..not just me. So many things went through my head but the one thing that shouted out the loudest was that I would be a mommy. Something I had waited for so long for.
As my husband and I went to pick up these two little ones, excitement filled us. Yet part of me felt like I was in some way turning my back on the little girl we had been hoping to adopt these last 6 months. Realistically, we weren't giving up hope on the little girl but rather it was because of this little girl that we realized we could do this "parenting" thing after all. The little girl we have visited and played with and had gotten to know had opened us up to realizing that our fears were just fears...they weren't reality.
Yet this journey of infertility hasn't stopped. We won't stop trying to have our own child, but we have realized we can love a child that isn't our own flesh and blood no matter what. Could it also be the little snuggling boy with his head resting against me as I fed him at 4 a.m this morning or his sister at 5:30 a.m. who climbed up onto the chair to snuggle up against me as she awoke early this morning? For that one moment in time I truly felt like someone's mommy....a feeling I had never felt until now.
These special little ones placed in our life may be only for a moment. Whether it be 3 months or 6 months, 1 year or 2 years, or even for a lifetime, our lives have been changed forever. We won't ever forget the little girl that gave us our hope back...and we will never forget these two little ones who have truly helped us in the 2 short days they have been a part of our family to remember to Believe in Miracles.
What a positive post! I want to do foster care really bad, but I can't because I have a little daycare and I think it would mess up my numbers and cause tax problems for me.
ReplyDeletehttp://wifethenmama.blogspot.com/2012/11/joyful-mother.html
This is my blog post I wrote on (kind of) the same topic.